Since I was a child I have this feeling that tells me I don't belong here. When I looked at all those people around me I used to ask myself where was I, what was I doing there and why I should go through all of this if I wasn't even staying here. I always had this feeling that one day someone will come and pic me up, taking me home, where I could feel comfortable and safe, not pretending to be something I wasn't and being  hurt by these people that even desurved my attention. The hardest feeling anyone can feel is when someone takes everything you have to offer and just throw it out. It hurts like shit. And I feel like that since I realized I was alive. I feel like it's never enough, like I am not suposed to grow up an be an adult, having a career and buyng a house, a car, nothing of this feels like reality to me. But here I am, no one came to take me home, whatever it is, no one had shown up to lead me to my real world, the world I really feel I belong but that I've even known. But I still feel that is real, that somewhere out there is my house, my stuff, my reallity. I blame myself everyday cause I feel like this fucking fake, selfish and corrupted world is taking over me, but that one inside still alive, crying and suffering, but I know it still there.